So recently I’ve had the misfortune of reading a certain series of books. Thankfully there are only two books in this series right now, so I didn’t have to read more. Before I continue there is something you should all know about me. If you haven’t noticed yet, I’m trying to become an author, I know, I know, I’m a masochist. I am currently in the process of editing my first manuscript called “The Male Amendment”. Revising and editing is hard work and when I need a break, I either workout or read a book. I told you I was a masochist, didn’t I?

Anyways, when I read while editing I look for books that are page turners, that are effortless to read, who’s main character I like, and that can be a sort of escape for me. This has lead me to mainly the middle grade fiction genre. Now the following review is not a reflection of the genre it’s self but of these novels in particular.

For those of you thinking “Sheesh! What did you expect?”

My answer is, “More damn it. More!”

I've recently read the “Evermore” series by Alyson Noel. Lets begin with the first book shall we? “Evermore” the name brings thoughts of eternity to mind. That’s definatly appropriate for these books.

The book opens up with a girl who can’t stand the touch of others because since the car accident that claimed her family she has been able to hear people’s thoughts. The slightest touch of another person gives Ever (the MC) a glimpse into that persons mind and life. I loved it!

Ever could see spirits. She conversed daily with her dead sister. All was fine and dandy until a new student shows up at school one day. Of course he's hot, rich, mysterious, and her ability to hear the thoughts of others goes away when she is near him. Score!!! Of course, he is prince charming, an immortal prince charming. Instead of chugging back some red bull, this immortal, Damen, has his own homemade ‘immortal juice’ that is the source of his immortality…yep…that’s what they named it ‘immortal juice’. Don’t give me that look, I didn’t name it.

Misunderstandings ensue, of course, but all-in-all this was shaping out to be a pretty good book. Until, the end. The final conflict was so anti-climatic I had though I had missed a chapter. Then another conflict arose at the end which was resolved in a pretty lame way. Because of it’s lameness or lack of tension the end felt a bit blasé to me. But I’d give it 6 stars out of 10. Not bad!

But then, a sequel was written called “Blue Moon”. Hopes for a pleasant read were dashed against repetitive descriptions, stupid moves by the MC, and a recycled plot twist that one of my favorite T.V. shows used years ago.

If I could count the number of times an eye roll was used in this book, I’d be sure to win a Purple Heart…except that I’m Canadian of course. Each time I read these two words “eye roll” I literally cringed as if I’d been wounded in some battle of pitiable narrative. I found it hard to even concentrate on the story when I read these words. They were like eye sores, un-ignorable unless I gouged my eyes out. They were like speed bumps littered through out the novel for me to trip over, each one pulling me out of the story, and just when I had forced myself back into the story, another one popped up. Erg!!!

If that weren’t bad enough a character the MC hasn’t trusted for the entire book, the guy who tries to kill the love of her life, tells Ever (the MC) that he had made a mistake. She falls for it!! She falls for it!! Is she from Mars? Erg!!! The MC is now a screen saver to me, looks good, but useless!

Then the final blow. At the very end of this book, because Ever is an idiot and it’s all her fault, Ever and Damen cannot touch each other or else Damen will die. Wait just one second now. That sounds a lot like the twist for the second season of Dark Angel. While this book showed promise--like when Ever has to choose between changing her past to save her family from dying, or saving Damen’s life--it ultimately sucked. I give this book 4 stars out of 10. It made me want to retch (see picture).

The only thing that could make me feel better was pulling out my foam-missle gun! I shall sleigh the horrid book with this mighty weapon! Bwahahahahahahahaha! Ha...ha...Ahem!

So, that's my book review. Bad books make Stella mad!


Monica said…
you're so adorable Stella!
Caroline said…
It sounds like it's trying to be the Twilight series! Even the covers-- especially Blue Moon's two hands holding a moon... it's like the two hands holding an apple on Twilight's cover. And then the second book's title, BLUE MOON is PRETTY MUCH IDENTICAL to NEW MOON! Oh, and the hot guy who's thoughts she can't hear is from True Blood -- Sookie & Bill. And that Ever & Damen can't touch each other... its like the abstinence pornography in Twilight! Hmmm. I will avoid this series, but thanks for taking a hit for all of us and making sure we don't waste our time!

Doesn't it make you wonder how it's possible that bad books can get published when its so hard to even get a manuscript LOOKED at? How do bad books out there make it? Bad books that make Stella MAD!!!??!

Love the pictures... especially the gag one. Hahahah!!!
Stella Telleria said…
Thank you ladies. I do what I can. ^_^

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